When I was a Primary School Kid.

When I was a primary school kid, I cannot remember how I behaved. However, I remember that I did not scream and shout or play, at least in class where my teacher was watching us like a hawk.

I was not the best pupil in my class, neither was I the worst. However, something in Primary 5 made me pulled up my socks. I scored a Band 3 for my Mathematics examinations... It was rather embarrassing for me, as I could not accept the fact that I did way below my 'normal' average of at least a Band 2. From the day I went home crying over spilt milk, I told myself that it would not occur again. True to my words, actions speak louder than words! I became super-duper 'kiasu' and I did a lot of revision through the last 1.5 years in my primary school.

I shared this personal experience with my Primary 3 class today. I told them, "I was not born smart. It was through a lot of hard work put in which allowed me to be who I am and where I am today." I could see signs of understanding flitting through a few of the more matured pupils in the class, while the rest are thinking of when the bell would ring, so as to signal the end of the day for them to say goodbye to me and leave for home to play the weekend away.

I looked at them and inwardly, I sighed. I left the classroom with a rather heavy heart today. Examinations is next week. Have they really prepared for it? Do they really understand the importance of it? Yes, I do agree that this paper chase is catching up with us and we might have become dehumanized in certain ways. However, without these pieces of 'worthless papers', we would really become worthless in many ways. True, these papers do not accurately measure your achievements in life, but these papers do, to a certain extent, measure your potential and gauge to see if you are ready to move on in your life. They may be young, but they are growing up, isn't it? Shouldn't they understand that this so-called paper chase is a stepping stone in life? Do they realise that this is only one of the many milestones that they have to clear in their study life?

Some of you may beg to differ. You might think that they are still young and I'm pressurising them. However, this is reality. I might not UNDERSTAND the importance of why i should be trying to do well in examinations, but I definitely KNOW that I should be doing well because I want to achieve something in my life.

I'm rambling and this post might not even make any sense. I just need to pen it down. I need to search for that burning passion that I once had (only 11 months ago) and lost somewhere among the numerous administration work that I've been doing. Kudos to those who have stuck by this profession for so long. I want to keep the fire burning. May God give me the strength and knowledge and power to persevere...